Waterloo Road

I think I done seen 'bout everything, when I see an elephant fly!

Great song – great lyrics – from Disney's Dumbo – as I recall.

Even better, Waterloo Road is back next week on the small screen. I'm an addict. Can't get enough of it. It reminds me of that old saying, “It hurts so good!” Yes, it is really that bad.

Today's EDP carried an interview with one of the stars of the show, Denise Welch, who plays French teacher Steph Haydock in the series. She's the one described as a “man-eater”. She is forever chasing the Head, Jack and never quite getting him.

She provides much of the compulsive nature of the viewing. Great scenes where she is in her classroom and berating the kids for their obsessive interest in personality instead of substance, their lack of real passion for French, rather than their real passion for each other. Honest, it's so substantive and so real. Happens every day in real schools. Honest.

Any road, the actress who play Steph is interviewed about her role in the series. She spouts the obligatory clap-trap about wishing she had more challenging roles, etc. Denise reveals that she once thought of becoming a drama teacher for real, but she was persuaded by her parents not to. Well done, Mom and Dad!!

She goes on to express her admiration for real teachers and reckons that, “they have a harder job than ever before, mostly because of the lack of respect they get from the pupils”. She comments, “ Kids are completely taking over the asylum. Teachers have absolutely no powers of discipline, and unfortunately the parents of these horrible children don't support the teachers at all. I'm not in the hang 'em high brigade, but I certainly don't think that being pulled out by the ear and being slapped over the knuckles with a ruler did any of us any harm.”

I think I done seen 'bout everything!

Let's see if I have this straight. This actress reckons that discipline in schools and the role of teachers in the system is becoming more challenging. She thinks that parents aren't supporting the teachers and a bit of corporal punishment would be a good thing.

Everything she does in her career on television is designed to make sure this does not happen. Can she really be this inane? The programme of which she is so proud of her role in works diligently to present the antithesis of good practice and good discipline in schools. Children watching the antics of the teachers at Waterloo Road can only be brain-washed to believe that teachers are unsupportive, sex-crazed morons who spend all day every day ignoring the learning needs of the children and focussing entirely on their own moronic adolescent imaginations and libidos. Teachers spend all their time gossiping about each other or speculating on who's having a relations ship with whom.

So like real life.

I love watching Waterloo Road because it's so bad. I think it might now be time to ban it in order to improve discipline in schools.

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