A House Divided

Trump Trumps All

Well, it's over. After what must surely rank as the strangest, most polarized campaign in history, Donald Trump is now the President-elect.

You have to go back to Abraham Lincoln's election to find an equivalent shake-up to the established order – and we all know where that led us.

Not since Dwight Eisenhower, a war hero with extensive experience of “governing” the most fragile coalition in history, has anyone entered the Oval Office with less governmental experience. This may or may not be a bad thing, but it is certainly unique.

First of all, how did he do it? As more and more information becomes known, it seems that almost anyone except Hillary could have won for the Democrats. In many respects, she lost it more that he won it.

But, it cannot be quite that simple. The fact is she got more votes, but he got them were it mattered. In state after state, he won a majority by simply not being Ms Clinton. Folks were not sure of much, other than that they were fed up with the Establishment and wanted a change. (Remind anyone of Brexit?). Out in the rust-belt where jobs have gone overseas and the blue-collar has not been replaced by the white collar the anger was thick and sloppy enough to cut with a dull butter knife.The more the voters were told about the bullying tactics of Trump, the misogamy, the crazy ideas and the lack of a coherent plan, the less they seemed to care. They wanted change, almost any change, and now they've got it.

I saw a quasi-poll that had Bernie Sanders running The Donald a close race and maybe winning. Why? Bernie was fresh, he was new, he was seen as a outsider and he was saying unpalatable things that upset the Establishment. Ditto The Donald.

Where do we go from here?

First, back to Lincoln who told us that a house divided against itself cannot stand. The protestors currently roaming the streets of New York, Chicago, Seattle and other great cities must be heard, but they must not be allowed to spoil the Trump victory with their vitriolic asserton that they will not accept the result. That is not the American way. Donald Trump has said he intends to be a President for all the people. He must get a chance to deliver.

But, deliver what?

The parties all publish their platforms. (In Britain they are called Manifestos.) What was in the Republican platform and can they deliver it? Here's what they said:

Taxes

The establishment of a pro-growth tax code as a moral imperative. We oppose

retroactive taxation. We condemn attempts by activist judges at any level of government to seize the power of the purse from the people’s elected representatives by ordering higher taxes. We oppose tax policies that deliberately divide Americans or promote class warfare. Because of the vital role of religious organizations, charities, and fraternal benevolent societies in fostering generosity and patriotism, they should not be subject

to taxation and donations to them should remain deductible. To guard against hypertaxation of the American people in any restructuring of the federal tax system, any value added tax or national sales tax must be tied to the simultaneous repeal of the Sixteenth Amendment. (Income Tax – my interjection and explanation) to switch to a territorial system of taxation so that profits earned and axed abroad may be repatriated for job-creating investment here at home. We believe American companies should be headquartered in America.

Well, they would say that wouldn't they. All parties say they are going to simplify the tax system, and raise more money whist actually cutting rates. It's what parties do. I remember The Donald telling the voters that the national debt had to be cut. How? When? Where?

Freeing financial markets

The Republican vision for American banking calls for establishing transparent, efficient markets where consumers can obtain loans they need at reasonable rates based on market conditions.

Hard to argue with this one – you might as well argue against Mom's apple pie. As usual the devil is in the detail.

Increase transport infastructure

Our country’s investments in transportation and other public construction have traditionally been non-partisan. Everyone agrees on the need for clean water and safe roads, rail, bridges, ports, and airports. President Eisenhower established a tradition of Republican leadership in this regard by championing the creation of the interstate highway system. In recent years, bipartisan cooperation led to major legislation improving the nation’s ports and waterways.

This looks like one of the key points that President Trump is going to be able to move on and move on quickly. Infastructure means improved competitiveness for business and lots of construction jobs for Trump supporters. Dare I mention The New Deal – or will many Republicans faint if I do?

Building the Future: America’s Electric Grid:

Our nation’s interstate electric transmission system has long been a catalyst for developing and delivering low cost energy while spurring economic growth throughout the United States. The grid is aging, vulnerable to cyber and terrorist threats, and unprepared to serve our energy needs of tomorrow.

Ditto the infastucture comments. Add the shale gas and the coal question. Can Trump find common ground with West Virginia miners and new-age, mega-bucks shale gas drillers?

Start-up Century: Small Business and Entrepreneurship

A central reason why the 20th century came to be called the American Century was the ability of individuals to invent and create in a land of free markets. Back then they were called risk-takers, dreamers, and small business owners. Today they are the entrepreneurs, independent contractors, and small business men and women of our new economy. Their innovation drives improvement. . .

Standard Republican fare here extolling the virtues of laissez-faire capitalism. But, when we are competing with countries who do not subscribe to this economic model, chiefly the Chinese, it does seem a bit pie-in-the-sky. Interestingly, it seems that the entrepreneurs of small-town America may have been the source of Trump's votes in states like Michigan, Pennsylvania and Ohio.

Workplace Freedom for a 21st Century Workforce (Republicans are traditionally anti-union or at least as ambivalent towards organised labor as the Conservative Party in the UK)

The greatest asset of the American economy is the hard-working American. That is why our first priority is getting people back to work by fostering the kind of growth that creates jobs.

Can't argue with this! Just tell us what it means.

A Federal Workforce Serving the People

We urge Congress to bring federal compensation and benefits in line with the standards of most American employees. A Republican administration should streamline personnel procedures to expedite the firing of bad workers, tax cheats, and scammers. The unionization of the federal workforce, first permitted by Democrat presidents in the 1960s, should be reviewed by the appropriate congressional committees to examine its effects on the cost, quality, and performance of the civil service. Union representatives in the federal workforce should not be paid to conduct union business on the public’s time.

Standard Republican ideas.

Reducing the Federal Debt

We must impose firm caps on future debt, accelerate the repayment of the trillions we now owe in order to reaffirm our principles of responsible and limited government, and remove the burdens we are placing on future generations. A strong economy is one key to debt reduction, but spending restraint is a necessary component that must be vigorously pursued.

Hard to square this one with the promise of infastructure improvements. In common with all governments, the reduction in debt is really tied to pie-in-the-sky improvements in the overall economy. If this happens debt can be repaid. If not?

We the People

We reaffirm the Constitution’s fundamental principles: limited government, separation of powers, individual liberty, and the rule of law. We denounce bigotry, racism, anti-Semitism, ethnic prejudice, and religious intolerance. Therefore, we oppose discrimination based on race, sex, religion, creed, disability, or national origin and support statutes to end such discrimination. As the Party of Abraham Lincoln, we must continue to foster solutions to America’s difficult challenges when it comes to race relations today.

Anyone against this one? I should hope not.

The Judiciary

The rule of law is the foundation of our Republic. A critical threat to our country’s constitutional order is an activist judiciary that usurps powers properly reserved to the people through other branches of government. Only a Republican President will appoint judges who respect the rule of law expressed within the Constitution and Declaration of Independence, including the inalienable right to ife and the laws of nature and nature’s God, as did the late Justice Antonin Scalia. We are facing a national crisis in our judiciary. We understand that only by electing a Republican President in 2016 will America have the opportunity for up to five new constitutionally-minded Supreme Court justices appointed to fill vacancies on the Court. Only such appointments will enable courts to begin to reverse the long line of activist decisions — including Roe, Obergefell, and the Obamacare cases — that have usurped Congress’s and states’ lawmaking. . .

This is a tough one. Reading it one way, you could be excused for thinking that the Republican party has lost its sense of the historical, constitutional process. The Constitution makes it clear that the three branches, President, Congress and the Judiciary are co-equal. Any attempt by any party to tamper with this principle is not only bound to fail but will simply garner the opprobrium of the American people. Even FDR found this out when he tried to pack the Supreme Court to get his New Deal legislation passed.

Reading it another way, it is true that the President can nominate Supreme Court judges who he thinks will see things his way. (This doesn't always work) Congress will scrutiize their appointment. The Donald made great pay in the campaign about Hillary appointing Supreme Court judges and how this must be opposed. He may well get some of his own medicine.

Administrative Law

We call on Congress to begin reclaiming its constitutional powers from

the bureaucratic state by requiring that major new federal regulations be approved by Congress before they can take effect, such as through the Regulation Freedom Amendment.

That's the way it's supposed to work. Just need to know what “major” is?

Defending Marriage Against an Activist Judiciary

Traditional marriage and family, based on marriage between one man and one woman, is the foundation for a free society and has for millennia been entrusted with rearing children and instilling cultural values.

This echoes Roe v Wade – another part of the circle which is going to be difficult to square as many of Trump'ssupporters will not, I believe, support restictions on either gay marriage or abortion. States rights?

It has always surprised me that either and/or both political parties seem to want to legislate public morality. Did they not learn from the Prohibition debacle?

On a personal level, I oppose on-demand abortion. But, I don't believe I have the right to impose my morality on others. The Republican-led federal government should stay out of the morality game. They can't win.

The First Amendment Religious Liberty

We pledge to defend the religious beliefs rights of conscience of all Americans and to safeguard religious institutions against government control.

Amen.

The First Amendment: - Constitutionally Protected Speech

We believe the forced funding of political candidates through union dues and other mandatory contributions violates the First Amendment. Just as Americans have a First Amendment right to devote resources to favored candidates or views, they have a First Amendment right not to be forced to individually support individuals or ideologies that they oppose. We agree with Thomas Jefferson that “To compel a man to furnish contributions of money for the propagation of opinions which he disbelieves and abhors is sinful and tyrannical.

Fairly typical Republican anti-union stuff here; however I agree – except workers who benefit from “closed-shop” agreements lawfully entered into by unions and employers, Workers can not opt-out simply to become cheap-skates! BTW the sound you may hear is Jefferson spinning rapidly in his grave when he is the subject of praise from a party whose ideas he would certainly oppose if he were alive.

The Second Amendment: Our Right to Keep and Bear Arms

We oppose ill-conceived laws that would restrict magazine capacity or ban the sale of the most popular and common modern rifle.

Nonsense. I support the Second Amendment. I do not believe the right to bear arms is unqualified. I'm presuming this is in the platform to pander to the NRA. This is a good example of why some people voted for Trump. People supported him for a variety of reasons.

The Fourth Amendment: Liberty and Privacy

Affirming the Fourth Amendment “right of the people to be secure in their houses, papers, and effects, against unreasonable searches and seizures,” we call for strict limitations on the use of aerial surveillance on U.S. soil, with the exception of patrolling our national borders for illegal entry and activity.

Typical politicians fudge. No unreasonable searches except when we think it's a good idea.

The Fifth Amendment: Protecting Human Life

. . . we assert the sanctity of human life and affirm that the unborn child has a fundamental right to life which cannot be infringed.

As I said, I support this philosophically, but it is a classic example of “Lord make me holy! (But not quite yet, please!)

The Fifth Amendment: Protecting Private Property

We call on Congress and state legislatures to enact reforms to protect law-abiding

citizens against abusive asset forfeiture tactics.

Sensible if applied sensibly. Not sensible if large landowners are allowed to milk the public purse.

The Fifth Amendment: Intellectual Property Rights

Today, the worst offenses against intellectual property rights come from abroad, especially in China. We call for strong action by Congress and a new Republican president to enforce intellectual property laws against all infringers, whether foreign or domestic.

Trump has already strongly hinted that the party is over for the Chinese. Good. Easy, quick and poular policy – except for the fact that they might ask for the debt to be repaid, like now.

The Ninth Amendment: The People’s Retained Rights

We welcome to our ranks all citizens who are determined to reclaim the rights of the people that have been ignored or usurped by the federal and intrusive state governments.

I suspect that what they mean is the things that they don't like.

The Tenth Amendment: Federalism as the Foundation of Personal Liberty

“The powers not delegated to the United States by the Constitution, nor prohibited by it to the states, are reserved to the States respectively, or to the people.”

States rights? Not again, surely! The Congress must not attempt to usurp the powers of the Supreme Court.

Honest Elections and the Electoral College

We oppose the National Popular Vote Interstate Compact and any other scheme to abolish or distort the procedures of the Electoral College.

I agree, despite the fact that Clinton won the popular vote. Remember Lincoln only won the popular vote in 1860 because he was not on the ballot in many southern states. The electoral college is a guarantee of state's legitimate rights.

Honest Elections and the Right to Vote

In order to preserve the principle of one person, one vote, we urge our elected representatives to ensure that citizenship, rather than mere residency, be made the basis for the apportionment of representatives among the states.

Unconstitutional.

The rest of the platform is really just a list of aims and ideas. Nothing wrong with that but it does occupy more than half of the platform pages with waffle.

When the dust settles what have we got?

A Republican President and a Republican controlled Congress should be able to get things done. People will be waiting, not very patiently, for them to get on with it. All Presidents get 100 days to get moving. President Trump will be no different. He has already hinted that big things are going to happen. Can he turn the rhetoric into action? The Speaker of the House, Paul Ryan, has said he is ready to seize the initiative, work with the adiministration and get things moving. Can he carry the house with him?

In the Senate it's 48 Dems and 52 Repubs. Trump should have support in the Senate, but Senators are notorious for their independence. Could be interesting.

The same can be said for the Supreme Court. Congress should be able to ratify any Trump nominees, but any really overt political ones may have problems.

The Bottom Line

I'm encouraged by most of the noises coming out of the President-elect's camp. Perhaps the reality of his achievement has just sunk in, but he certainly looks and sounds more presidential. He wants to be everyone's President and although all Presidents-elect say that I'm prepared to give him the benefit of the doubt. Only time will tell if he can bridge the gulf between rhetoric and reality. Perhaps, as a reality TV star he will find it easy. Somehow I've got my doubts.

An Election Like No Other

The most entertaining take on the Presidential race this week was from Niall Ferguson, writing in the Sunday Times under the headlline: Serial lecher Trump finally blows up. But that's not why he deserves to lose.

He compares the candidates to mobile phones. “Donald Trump is the Samsung Galaxy Note 7 of US politics – a phone so hurriedly assembled that it spontaneously combusts. That would make Hilary Clinton the iPhone7. She's essentially the same as your current President but harder to connect to and with inferior email security. . . . The American public is fascinated by Trump, but in the way people are fascinated by a really gruesome car crash. It is bad enough to boast that you have groped women. It is fatal to deny it only to have numerous women appear within days to state that oh yes you did. In March, I observed that Trump's “caveman politics” was based on a deeply phoney machismo. A man who has to reassure the world about the size of his genitals is not macho he wrote.

Yet it will be tragic if history records that Trump lost the 2016 election because he confessed to, and was then accused of, sexual assault that he then denied. . . . After all we have had sexually hyperactive Presidents before. Quite apart from the dalliances of Bill Clinton, recall the priapism of JFK, still among the most revered Presidents in US history.

(I interject the following from Wikipedia, "" But Warren G. Harding is really in a category of his own. No other philandering chief executive had the 29th president’s way with words (he termed the vagina of one of his mistresses “Mrs. Pouterson”) or his sense of scenery (he and Nan regularly had sex in a White House closet). And, as was underscored this week, when news broke that Harding did in fact father a child with Britton as she had claimed, no other was quite as reckless with his libido."")

The reason we should pray for Trump to lose is not for the future safety of female air travellers or beauty queens, but for the future security of the western world. . . the most shocking aspect of the Trump campaign is not the revelation that he is a serial sexual harasser, but rather that he is the dupe, if not the pawn of the Russian President, Vladimir Putin.

As November 8^th approaches, the mud-slinging will intensify. So, will the cyber-warfare. And the more complicated the allegations become, the more voters will tune out and make their decision on the basis of feelings, rather than facts that they no longer trust.

The scariest thought of all is that if they don't like the ultimate result, they won't trust that either. For proof that this election is rigged, download the Sputnik app to your smartphone today.”

Niall may be correct, but if not he is at least very entertaining!

Chiefs Prospects 2016 Season

Chop till you Drop!
I have been tardy.  I usually do my Chiefs analysis and forecast for the season before the season starts.  I've been busy.

Perhaps it is no bad thing.  Two games into the season gives me an opportunity for the scales to fall from the eyes and a more realistic mood to prevail.  Two games in and the tribe are 1-1.  They beat San Diego (a division rival) and lost to the Texans.  The first game saw a great comeback and the second almost no offence at all in a 19-12 defeat.

As usual, the rock is on Alex Smith's shoulder.  He was brilliant in Week One and very ordinary in Week Two.  Consequence?  We are one and one.

What are the Chiefs up to on offence this season.  They brought in Nick Foles to back up Smith.  Chase Daniel was the back up but went in free agency.  Foles is a proven NFL QB with the Eagles.  Hit me with a brick, but I can see a scenario where Alex Smith doesn't perform and Foles is at the helm.  An NFL back up QB is always just one snap away from starting no matter what the coaches say to the media.  Forget what Andy Reid says if he thinks Smith is not doing it he will change to Foles.  They have kept Tyler Bray as third QB.  Someday my dream will come?  He has the size, the arm and is getting the experience.  He may well be the future.

Running backs should be the strength of the team.  Anthony Sherman is a mainstay at fullback.  Jamaal Charles is still a class act.  Spencer Ware is getting a lot of snaps.  Chacandrick West is a capable back-up.  Knile Davis has slipped down the pecking order, but still has a role in kick returns.  The problem is Charles has yet to play.  Ware and West have shared the work and whilst both are capable, Charles has really been missed.  If the running-back-offence starts to click when he does then fine.  If not – big trouble.

The wide receiver corps has been revamped. (About time too!)  Jeremy Macklin leads.  Chris Conley is now a second year receiver.  Tyrek Hill is listed but is really a kick returner.  The rest?  De'Anthony Thomas who has mysteriously been inactive for the first two games, Demarcus Robinson, a rookie and Albert Wilson a 200 pound 5' 9” receiver (very out-of-date in the NFL).  You can still make a case that this group is not going to scare anyone and not going to help Smith very much in his quest to become an elite QB.

How about the O-line.  Lots of folks are very big on this group.  I wish I could join them.
The eight listed linemen have a grand total of 17 years of NFL experience.  That's not a lot.  Eric Fisher is now a very solid tackle.  He is moving forward from the burden of being a Number 1 pick in the draft.  The Chiefs apparently love Mitchell Schwartz who was a free agent signing.  The Canuck Duvernay-Tardiff is flavour of the month.  Unfortunately, in game two Parker (rookie starter) and Tardiff were injured and inactive.  The Texans pass rush had a field day.  When they are all healthy we'll see.  I'm not convinced that this is their year.  Maybe in 2017-18 but not today.

Turning to the defence which, as everyone with a brain cell knows, is what wins titles and Super Bowls.  What was a strength is now just about average.  Justin Houston is injured and will not return for some time.  Tamba Hali is just about past his sell by date.  The corners look just about Ok with Marcus Peters a stand-out.  The D-line should be good but has struggled to create any pass rush.  On a one to ten grading system they get about a 5.5.  This will not be good enough for the play-offs and may not even be good enough to get them there in the first place.
Special teams are very good.  Santos kicks as good as most.  Tyrek Hill may get you some touchdowns on punts and kick-offs.

The coaching is what it is.  There is no pressure real on Andy Reid.  They are stable.  They have good, experienced and capable coaches on the staff.  They need to earn their money now.  Anyone can coach an exceptionally good team.  Can they make winners out of some mostly average talent?  We'll see.

NHS Budgets - Junior Doctors

Money Talks - Bullsh** walks - as usual.

I'm back. After the summer break wherein readers were deprived of both my expertise and sterling wit, I renew my efforts with both humility and verve.

The Junior doctors are striking in a series of five-day walk-outs. Patient care will suffer as sure as eggs are eggs. What's it all about?

Firstly, it is essential to remember that no system of health care can possibly function without the consent and support of the health care professionals involved. That's the bottom line. The NHS could not have come into being were it not for many compromises made to keep the doctors on-board. ( Most serious was the opposition of doctors who disliked the idea of becoming employees of the state. Doctors were in an extremely powerful position, as without them the National Health Service (NHS) could not operate, and the government was forced to make a number of compromises. General Practitioner (GP) surgeries remained private businesses that could be bought and sold, and the NHS effectively gave these practices contracts to provide health care. Only the most senior doctors in hospitals (consultants) were allowed to continue private treatment. Similar compromises were worked out with dentists. Aneurin Bevan conceded these points in order to make the NHS work, but he was not happy with them. ) - The Cabinet Papers

Even today the NHS can not possibly function without the doctors being extensively involved.

For some reason, known only to the government and Jeremy Hunt, this fact has been conveniently forgotten. The government has imposed a new contract on the Junior doctors and they don't like some of the provisions. The government's goal of creating a seven day service cannot be done without the doctors and their good will. Somebody has forgotten to line up the ducks.

What are they up to? Why pick a fight you can't win? It's the old story, money talks and bulls**t walks.

The government knows very well that you can have any sort of NHS you are willing to pay for. They are just not willing to pay for it. So, they need to increase the work load of doctors and the new contract is the way they have chosen to accomplish it.

In response. the doctors are trying to occupy the moral high ground. They need to convince the public, whose support they still have, that this is nothing to do with money. This is, of course, nonsense but they keep pushing it. Their support among the public is slipping. If the planned 5 day strikes go ahead they will soon lose the support altogether.

Any light at the end of the tunnel? Well, not all doctors are quite so convinced that the new contract is the work of the devil. Cracks are appearing in the support of the various Royal Colleges to which the doctors belong. Time is running out.

Very soon, some people are going to die who might have lived. Where will the blame be apportioned? The Government? The BMA?

One thing is probably sure – the bean counters (the real culprits in the piece) will get off scot free. Money talks . . . .

Brexit

 New song - "I got the real lowdown Brexit Blues"

I went to bed early last Thursday thinking that when I got up it would be over. It was.

I took the precaution of asking Pete to check with the bookies on the odds for remain. Remain in the EU was favourite – about 6/4 on. Early on the pound went up in value to about 1.50 against the dollar. When the result became clearer it tanked and ended up about 1.30. How did the bookies get it so wrong again?

Pete explained. Lots of big money went on remain from the “elite”. Big bets in currency terms but small on numbers. Hence the odds and hence the win for leave.

Then the snowball began to roll. Little Dave Cameron (he used to be Big Dave) is toast. Jeremy Corbin is being crucified for a seeming lack of enthusiasm for remain and probably won't last the rest of the week.

How did this happen?

Firstly, and this will become increasingly important as we move forward, it was close. About a million votes swung it. With 33 million voting that qualifies as close where I come from. Secondly, and I was the first that I know of to point this out, it was those at the bottom of the socio-economic ladder that voted quite largely for getting out. Or, as I so eloquently put it – the lunatics have taken over the asylum. The Dewsbury Chavs, the Monkey Hangers and the Yarmouth Oicks are now running the country.

Why?

Immigration, immigration, immigration. The leave campaign managed to successfully shift the blame for all the country's ills from the Tory government to immigrants. “It was the Sun wot done it!”. They convinced the less than literate masses that if we just get out of the EU things will not only be fine – they will actually be better. There was no evidence for this of course, but in true “Big Lie” fashion they just kept banging on about it and some of it stuck.

It was the old folks who voted in big numbers who won it for leave. The under 30's voted to stay in. It was the disadvantaged, the destitute, the angry and not too sure who to blame, the irrational, the ill-educated, the unemployed or under-employed, the ill-advised, the Little Englanders, the downtrodden, the oldies who wanted to return to the “good old days”, them that harken back to an England of full employment for the masses and “homes fit for heroes”, those that felt that the prosperity which is largely confined to southern England in general and London in particular had passed them by, and those simply looking for a convenient scapegoat.

The Tories should have not been so surprised. They have spent the last decade using the EU as a nice, comfortable whipping boy when things weren't going so well. They have just woken up to what it has cost them. Little Dave for starters. Credibility with the voters for afters. They have now learned, to their cost, that government by referendum is a dangerous beast.

The Tories only crumb of comfort is that the Labour Party is, if it is possible, in even worse shape. Jeremy Corbin is reaping the whirlwind. His support for remain was seen as lukewarm at best and the attack dogs are out to get him. They are likely to succeed. Whether in the short term they can get their act together, unite behind a new leader and force an election they might win is less than certain. We'll see.

Scotland and Northern Ireland are the flies in the ointment. Both these parts of the UK voted to stay in the EU. What to do? The Scottish Nationalists are in Brussels right now seeking ways to remain in the EU even if the rest of the UK leaves. You couldn't make it up! The Irish are likely to have some sort of border with the EU (in the shape of Eire) and this is an anathema to the Ulster Unionists. Great. No comfort there.

Economically, things have stabilised. The stock market has adjusted – lower but adjusted. The pound seems happy at its new level. Will this last? No-one knows.

Meanwhile our erstwhile partners in the EU are cursing their own stupidity for the drafting of Article 50 – that's the one that prescribes how a country can leave the EU. The ball is firmly in the UK’s court. The clock does not begin to tick on leaving until the UK gives formal notice that it is actually leaving. What, I hear you say? The result of the referendum was leave, so leave you must! Well, not exactly!

Many English people – perhaps even most – do not really understand how they are governed. In the USA sovereignty resides with the people. In the UK it lies with the Queen in Parliament. In theory, there is no limit to the powers of Parliament, provided they can get the sovereign to agree. So, despite the fact that the people voted for Brexit, Parliament could take a different view. All political parties and all politicians have been queuing up to swear blind that the referendum must be respected. But, there is probably a majority in Parliament that might vote for a second referendum – especially if the predictions of the “Inners” begin to come true.

This may be already happening as EU leaders maintain that the UK can not get “easy” terms for Brexit – they are scared stiff that their own electorate might want to do the same. The UK is going to have to pay for the privilege of leaving – the only question is – how much?

Down the line we have Donald Trump giving his support to the leavers. We have the EU Parliament saying, “Go, and go now!” We have a leadership election in the Conservative Party. We have the official opposition in free-fall with Jeremy Corbin just holding on by his fingertips.

Where do we go from here? As predicted no-one really knows. That, strangely, is what people voted for. All the big wigs told them not to vote for uncertainty, but they did it anyway. Whatever happens it sure will be interesting!

At the Hospital

Chapter Eight

Norfolk and Norwich University Hospital

Wherein I learn some new skills, use my science training, see first hand the fragility of life and bring to a close the chapters of my working life.

I became a housekeeper on the Acute Medical Unit at the Norfolk and Norwich University Hospital.

The NHS is the largest employer in Western Europe. I hardly even registered as a cog in this enormous wheel. But, it was valuable work and I saw it as giving something back to the community – and I didn't mind getting paid for it either.

I job-shared with two ladies, Debbie and Chris. They liked working mornings and early afternoons and I liked late mornings and late afternoons. Perfect.

I used my bus pass to get in about 10 and get home about 6 – three days a week on a rotating shift pattern. There was no weekend working. Perfect.

Housekeeper is a bit of a misleading job title. What we did was more like being a gopher or dog's body. We looked after the stock, including the essential equipment used on the ward. We made sure the nurses had everything they needed to do their job. We made sure everything was where it ought to be and, if it wasn't, made sure we got it there. We overcame difficulties. It was interesting and not too taxing for old folks.

On the ACU people died. In many cases that's why they ended up there. The arrived, old, frail and sick: they received end of life care and they died. So, the sound of the alarm going off, the dash for the crash trolley and the attempts to resuscitate were just part of the everyday rhythm of work. Took some getting used to. All in all, it was interesting and not too taxing, or, as they say it kept me out of the pub.

As time moved on it became apparent that my knees were not doing the NHS much good. I had a lot of pain and my mobility decreased markedly. I didn't feel as if I was able to contribute and I didn't like the feeling.

An opportunity came up to actually retire on my 65^th birthday and I took it.

Here endeth, as they say the story of my working life.

Chapter Seven - School Days

Chapter Seven

School Days

Wherein I move to a new country, start a new job, learn a new sport and engage in some very interesting sidelines.

We took the train from KC to NY. That way we could “easily” transport the suitcases and whacking great crates. It was an overnight train and I enjoyed the daytime sights as we trundled through Pittsburg. Very scenic.

I arrived in England on the QE II in June of 1974. We docked at Southhampton where we were met by my father-in-law. He had hired a small van to transport the crates containing all our worldly goods.

I distinctly remember the Immigration Officer asking Maureen if she had come home to have the baby in a sneering, deprecating tone.

Whilst they unloaded the passengers' luggage, we went into Southampton and had some lunch.

On our return we found the terminal closed with our possessions inside. We found an unlocked door and dragged the stuff up a down-escalator and out the door. Not a customs official in sight. We should have brought some guns or narcotics – there would never be a better chance!

I set about trying to find a teaching job. In the meantime I visited the Labour Exchange and they fixed me up with a job at Kingers gasket factory in Foots Cray. It was my first introduction to the world of work in the UK – and what an introduction. I worked in the warehouse with two old boys whose names now escape me. The day went like this: we arrived and clocked on. We stood about for a bit and then we went for breakfast in the staff subsidised canteen. A “full English” set you back about 20p. We wandered back to the warehouse and did a bit – we gathered some gasket material and placed it on a trolley. We moved the trolley about for someone else to pack the stuff and get it ready to ship.

We went to lunch.

After lunch we did almost nothing – maybe a bit of tidying up or re-arranging the stacks of gaskets.

The “old lags” had made a kind of makeshift rest area out of some tatty packing crates. It had rustic chairs and a battered, dilapidated old sofa. They sat about most of the afternoon studying the racing form. I often went to the bookies to place bets or collect winnings.

Then it was quitting time. We went home. We were paid not very much.

Interestingly the whole of Britain operated roughly on the same principles at that time. There was almost no unemployment, but everywhere was grotesquely inefficient and over-staffed. Maggie Thatcher would see to that.

I was still looking for a teaching job and one came up near Gt Yarmouth in Norfolk. From my extensive research, I knew that the East coast was the warmest and driest part of Britain. My kind of town. (Actually, I still like Gt Yarmouth even though I don't live near there – and I am definitely in the minority!)

Got the job.

In 1974, believe it or not, there was no rental market for properties in England. I know it sounds strange with the emphasis on Buy-to-Let with which we currently suffer; but it is, nevertheless, true. Somehow we managed to rent a house in Winterton-on-Sea for the princely sum of £10 a week (a lot of money in those days).

I began teaching in September 1974 and I was not very good at it. Looking back I can say without much argument that I was not only inexperienced but also suffering from culture shock. The country was new. The school was unlike any in Missouri and the children were somewhat of a mystery to me.

I stayed there for 11 years. My problem has always been, believe it or not, that I don't really like change. I'm a bit of a stick-in-the-mud. So I stayed and gradually got better at the job and began, almost, to think it was a good career choice. Then the school decided to close for lack of pupil numbers and I was made redundant.

In the summer I did a variety of seasonal jobs. I cleaned swimming pools. I cleaned pubs. I cleaned toilets. Such was the life of a hard-up young teacher. I delivered newspapers – wholesale. Start at 04:30. Rode my bike from Winterton to Yarmouth and then back to Scratby to teach all day. I worked at North Denes airfield doing security checks for off-shore workers. I loaded sightseers into light aircraft. I refuelled helicopters. I did almost anything to make a buck.

During that time I played basketball for the Gt Yarmouth Gunners and cricket for, firstly, NALGO in the Gt Yarmouth Mid Week League and secondly for Belton CC in the Norfolk Cricket League. I had never seen a cricket match until 1974 when I used to watch the old John Player League (yes, cigarette manufacturers sponsored many sports in those days) and listen to Test Matches on the radio with Johners, CMJ. Blowers, Aggers and, of course, the best of all, John Arlott.

All this coincided with two children, a divorce, and a remarriage.

After a few months of unemployment and being unable to find a suitable teaching job, I went to work for Dardan Security as a guard. I did shifts at Bacton gas terminal. It was tiring and uninteresting, but it did keep the wolf from the door.

Some people I knew were teaching at Finborough School (then St George's) near Stowmarket in Suffolk. An English job came up and I got it. I started in September 1987 along with my good buddies John Cowley (Head of Maths) and Steve Banks (Head of History). I had to work away from home during the week. I had a small room at Finborough. I worked some weekends. I stayed there until my retirement in 2004.

Eventually, I became a good teacher. Good enough to be nominated for the Teaching Awards anyway – but I didn't win. At the end of the day, teaching is actually quite a simple job. As I was fond of explaining to the teacher trainees I occasionally supervised, all you have to do is to get kids to do things they would rather not. Not that they won't do it necessarily, it's just that given a choice they would rather not. There are as many ways of doing this as there are good teachers. I also explained that if you cannot do this you are going to have a miserable life, so leave now. Do not pass go, do not collect the 200. Go and get a “real job”.

The first year was quite trying and I seriously though about giving up, but I persevered and eventually got paid for doing what I like and would have probably done for free. I talked about and read good books. I taught Shakespeare and Chaucer to the sixth form. Eventually, I was persuaded to take on the role of Head of the English Department. I made many very good friends.

In 2004 I was approaching the age when I always said teachers should retire, for after the age of 50-55 you become out of touch with the next generation. So, when the boss offered me early retirement I took it.

After a short interlude, I decided that I would have nothing whatsoever to do with education ever again. Opportunities to continue to mark exams were there, substitute teachers were always in demand and experienced, successful teachers are always in short supply. Non of this attracted me, so I decided to do nothing at all.

Then one day I was reading the EDP and a job advert for a Housekeeper at the Norfolk and Norwich University Hospital seemed so interesting that I (stupidly) mentioned it to Juliet who said that I should apply. So I did. I got an interview. I got the job.

This was only made possible by giving up smoking. In 2004, post retirement from teaching, I said to Juliet that it was time to go to France to stock up on cheap baccy. She said, “I think I'll give up.”

I said, “I think I'll join you.”

She said, “You'll never do it.”

We went to the surgery and go all the gear - inhilators, patches, nicotine gum and lozenges, We set a date to give up. I woke up, put on a patch and puffed at the inhilator all day. It was a long day – a very long day.

In the evening I took Juliet to an art class at the Hoveton Village Hall. I went straight to the local store and bought 10 cigs. I sat in the car and smoked one. That was the last cigarette I ever had. I gave the nine smokes left to my step-son Steve and told him to take them to Norwich (he was going out that evening) and give them to some old down and out. I believe he did.

I persevered and was rewarded. A good test came about a week into the challenge. I had to go to a cricket committee meeting in Dereham. Dereham is a funny old place. No matter how many times I go there I never feel entirely confident about finding my way about. I did have a favourite parking spot but it was occupied so I had to find a new one. It was in a car park behind some shops. After the meeting I could not remember where the car was. I must have got turned around, for I just could not find it. Would that I had a ciggie I would have lit it. I wandered about for what seemed an hour before I found the car. That was the last time I really fancied a smoke.

I was one of the lucky ones. You can blow smoke in my face and it does not elicit a craving.

Because I gave up I could work at the hospital. So I did.

EU Referendum

Striking similarities with 1861

We now know the date of the UK referendum on membership of the European Union.

The politicians are falling over one another to get on the TV and air their views.

I can see some interesting similarities to the conflict that tore the US apart over 150 years ago. Both conflicts are essentially about “States Rights”.

Of course, there are significant differences. No-one is suggesting that the UK might secede from the EU and declare war on the others. But what is undeniable is that a UK exit would bring to the fore many of the tensions in the EU that might leave it fighting for its life.

Try as I might it is difficult not to see the Brexit campaigners (have you ever seen such an assortment of idiotic losers as Farage, Galloway and Co.?) as throwbacks to the political class of the pre-Civil War South. They have as their basic tenet the idea that they can prevent the rest of the country (read Continent) from making any progress by simple obstructionism.

As the Confederacy found, by simply crying wolf over and over again you may persuade most of you citizens to follow you over the precipice but the end result is you are falling a long way and the ending is as painful as it is final.

The EU, like the ante-bellum US, is by no means prefect. But, you cannot “stop all the clocks” nor will friendly bombs fall on Brussels. The fact is that Britain is part of the continent of Europe. An accident of real climate change made it so. Until the warming which brought about the present geological era began, the island was still physically joined to Europe. No amount of “little-Englander” rhetoric will obviate this fact.

As with the CSA, trying to occupy the same continent and peacefully co-existing with your close neighbours is just not going to be an option. Leave the EU and they will turn on you with the fury and resolve of an Abe Lincoln. (Angela Merkel)

Reams will be written about the up-coming vote. Today's Sunday papers are full of it (quite literally - in any sense of the expression that you may wish to append to it).

My bottom line – rule by referenda is a very poor way of governing a country. Dave only promised a referendum to (a) placate an implacable right wing of his party and (b) because all the polls said a hung parliament and, therefore, he wouldn't really have to provide it.

Events have proven him wrong. He may find that the price of remaining in is too high for his political future. He may well win the vote – but in the process he will become a Jefferson Davis leader – fatally flawed and fatally stabbed in the back by his “friends”.

Western Electric Again

Chapter Six

Wherein I return to civilian life, return to work at Western Electric, continue my glittering academic career, lose some teeth and become disenchanted with the rat race and the attendant quest for material gain

We landed in KC at the old airport called, I believe, Kansas City Municipal Airport. (Still there - just used nowadays for light aircraft.)

My Dad, sister Lynne and brother Jim were there to meet us.

At that time the OM was living at 4324 S. Saville in Independence. After a few days of happy reunion time I went back to Western Electric to get my job back. Uncle Sam looks after his vets.

I did a week on days as a floor hand and then I was back on nights in the packing department. Of course, all the products made at WE had to packed up for shipment to the desired locations. So, we packed them.

Hours of work were 1600 – midnight, 5 days a week. What I remember most about the packing department was being left-handed. When I arrived for the evening shift I had to move everything around so that I could pack things the way which seemed most logical and most expeditious for a left-handed person. My colleagues could never figure out what I was doing, but it worked for me.

At this time I was also slowly resuming my academic career. I had finally decided to be a teacher. Why? Well, I had always followed the line of least resistance and since I was good at English and Biology they had become by default, my major and minor. But what to do with them? The career path seemed very limited. Whilst there are jobs called Biologist there are no jobs called Englishist. You might par-lay an English degree into a spot in journalism or some other related activity, but the line of least resistance is teaching.

“Those who can do – those who can't teach.”

Therefore I was accepted onto the teacher education programme at CMSU.

A routine developed. Up about 7. In the car by 7:30. Drive to CMSU at Warrensbugh for 9. Back in the car by 3. Drive to WE in Lee's Summit for 4. Work til midnight. Home by 12:30. Bed – get up and do it all over again the next day.

We did get weekends off and some vacation time. One weekend we went to the lake with Stoner and I tried water-skiing. I was doing great but eventually, of course, fell off. I landed awkwardly on my head and dislodged my upper denture. I made a grab for it, but my life vest stopped me from reaching it. Costly and embarrassing!

I finally got out of the packing department. I went back to being a floor-hand in Transistors. In Transistors I was paired with another floor-hand, Danny Ray Grimm. What a character!

Danny Ray had a large FuManchu tash and long hair. He had a brilliant plan to account for the fact that we were not allowed to smoke in the WE factory. Nobody said we couldn't chew tobacco.

(My first experience of chewing tobacco was at Ft Hood. At the end of the month – just before pay-day – when there was not a spare nickel to be had in the entire battalion we would scrounge up enough cash for a pack of Winstons and some chewing tobacco. Sharing both we would get a good chaw going and then light up. Get you about as high as you can – legally.)

So at WE, just to piss off the supervisors, we would wander about the department sweeping and chewing, oh yes, and spitting in all the bins (fortunately they had plastic liners and it was one of our jobs to empty them).

I have a abiding memory of Danny Rae leaning on his broom, listening intently to what the super was telling him with an un-nerving brown bit of tobacco juice leaking from the corner of his mouth. Priceless!

Come lunch time we would go out for lunch. Lunch breaks were staggered, so Danny had a plan. We signed out at the gate for first lunch break, he got one of the girls to punch us back in at the appropriate time and we stayed out for 3x lunch breaks – so we could sit in the car and drink Thunderbird before staggering back. He even managed to sneak a bottle of Southern Comfort into the department one Xmas. We drank it. I was violently sick. Even today just the smell of Southern Comfort is enough to make me gag.

Summing up Danny Rae – once the cops stopped him in his pick-up truck. He was surrounded by and knee deep in beer cans (empty). Somehow he managed to get them to let him go and drive on. What a character!

Like all good things Western Electric had to end. I was in my last year at CMSU and deep into teacher training. I had to do my practice teaching (I lucked out there – I got a placement at Truman HS – about a quarter of a mile from my house.) I figured I could not do both, so I had to quit.

Practice teaching at Truman High was interesting. For one thing, I had my dopey brother Mark in Homeroom. (Oddly none of the kids ever put two and two together and made us family – they were not the brightest tools in the shed) My supervising teacher was Mrs Meredith and I suspect she secretly despaired at my career choice. What I most remember about the teaching of English at Truman High School in 1974 was that it was mind-bogglingly boring (sorry Mrs Meredith, but it was).

I passed and got my degree and a life-time certificate to teach in the public schools of Missouri. Much to the state's profound disappointment, I decided to move to England. So we did.

US Army Norway

Chapter Five

Wherein I learn to ski, become a troglodyte, help avert a Cold War crisis, meet some interesting locals, get married and generally have a great (but cold) time

BJ and I landed at Fornebu in September 1970. Located on one of the many islands in Oslo fjord, Fornebu was the airport serving Oslo in the 1970's. We landed and were met in the terminal by a GI, Jose Carasco. We grabbed our kit bags and drove to Kolsas, a pleasant suburb about 10 miles from down-town Oslo. The major feature in Kolsas is the mountain, which rises steeply from the main road from Sandvika. It was inside this mountain I was destined to spend the next 18 months (sorry, not all the time – just working hours!).

Kolsas held the HQ of Allied Forces Northern Europe. Very impressive sounding – the reality was slightly different. 

 Backtracking slightly, Norway is a member of NATO, but also has a long tradition of “seeming” neutrality. Therefore, we were there - but not really there. We were “encouraged”, for example, not to wear our uniforms when off the base.

Norwegian independence was sorely tried in WWII when the Germans invaded and, in the process, helped to introduce a new word into the English language – quisling. A quisling is a traitor and is so named after one Vidkun Quisling. “He was put on trial during the legal purge in Norway after World War II and found guilty of charges including embezzlement, murder and high treason. He was executed by firing squad at Akershus Fortress, Oslo, on 24 October 1945. The word quisling has since become a synonym for collaborationist, an allusion to the very poor light in which Quisling's actions were seen both at the time and after his death.” - Wikipedia

Consequently, the Norwegians are somewhat suspicious of foreign military forces being stationed on their soil. Low profile was the watchword.

The NATO base at Kolsas contained an interesting blend of the various NATO forces. There was the Norwegian Army and Air Force. The Norwegian Army took care of the base security and consisted mostly of young Norwegians doing their national service. The Norwegian Air Force personnel were more career-armed-forces orientated. The Danes were out in force, Army, Navy and Airforce. The UK was well-represented with a full complement of the three services. Our happy band consisted of the US Army Element, AFNORTH (about a dozen), some US Airforce (again about a dozen) and one or two US Navy personnel. Total (minus officers) - about 30. In short it was like being in the Army, but not really. The officers and NCO's of the US Army Element had no real contact with us on a day to day basis.

The Communications Center was located inside Mt Kolsas. Those friendly Germans had tunnelled it out during WWII and the Norwegians simply took it over. It was a ideal spot for a Com Center. Buried under a mountain of rock with enormous blast doors to get through, we were much better placed to withstand a Cold War nuclear fry-up than most. Fortunately, we were not tested in this regard during my tenure – though we did have quite a hairy time during the Prague Spring of 1969. All in all it was an extremely pleasant place to work – deep in the mountain it was a constant temperature (outside it might be 20 below!) we had a canteen which served light meals during office hours, complete with beer for the Danish and Norwegian contingent - who subscribed to the theory that life without beer is not worth living.

We worked a shift system. Days – 08:00-16-00. Swings 1600-22:00 and Mids – 22:00-08:00. So, you did two swings, then two days then two nights and then had 4 days off. And by off I mean actually off – for their were no military duties whatsoever. Months could, and did, go by without seeing a US Army NCO or officer. Even the mail was delivered to your mailbox outside the US Army Element AFNORTH office so you could pick it up at a convenient time, i.e. when no-one was about!

So, what did we do? We relayed messages to the various NATO commands all over Europe. We received a message, logged it and sent it on to its destination. Simple.

In addition to the easy working hours with plenty of time off, we always had more than enough people to cover each shift adequately. Each shift had an NCO in charge of the Com Centre and he (usually it was a UK Army Sergeant) would assess their shift needs and offer “stand downs” to personnel that were not really needed. Everyone did the day shifts. Swing shifts and night shifts could be subject to a “stand-down”. In a lucky month you might get the first swing shift and the last mid shift off. Therefore, you actually worked 4 days and had 8 off in that cycle. Not bad – and the pay was good as well, for we received COLA (cost of living allowance) on account of Norway being such an expensive country to live in. Our barracks were comfortable with two or three man rooms, the food was good in the main base canteen, the work was not difficult – repetitive and boring but not difficult, we received a duty-free allowance of 1000 cigs and 4 bottles of spirits a month – and I mean real duty-free – not the airport type – but the real thing. Ciggs at a dollar a carton and whiskey at two bucks a fifth.

We were about half an hour by trikk (train) from down-town Oslo, which had the usual capital city style entertainments. For local entertainment we had the Junior Ranks Club – basically a bar with seating for about 50. Let's face it, when it is very cold and very dark there isn't much else to do other than hang out in the Club and have a few drinks. The added bonus came in the form of local girls who would gladly be our guests for the evening. Anyone could go to the main gate and sign them in (so much for security).

On particularly boring evenings someone (inevitably) would go to their room and bring back a fifth of whiskey and we would share it. We went to Oslo to the bowling alley. We shopped a Steen & Strom ( http://www.steenstrom.com/who-are-we/about-scandinavia/ ). We organised ski trips to Geilo and Lillehammer – where the Olympics were held in 1994. There was a very nice, but very expensive, restaurant at Hollmenkollen just next to the Olympic ski jump. We skied cross-country style on the numerous ski trails which dot the Norwegian countryside near Kolsas. There was lots to do.

In the summer it was surprsingly warm. We sailed on Oslo fiord. We camped at Horten and took the ferry across Oslo fiord to Moss.

The truth is It was an eighteen month holiday in beautiful surroundings with excellent companions and plenty of money. Eventually I rented one-fifth of a large house in Jar with some buddies and only went to the base to work. I managed to source an abandoned Volvo from someone who was rotating back to the US for a song and drove it everywhere.

In November of 1969 we went to Weisbaden AFB (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lucius_D._Clay_Kaserne ) to play in a basketball tournament. It was not like the NCAA Final Four, but it was a kind of vacation courtesy of AFNORTH. Teams from small commands like ours from all over Europe were invited.

We flew to Rhine-Main AFB (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rhein-Main_Air_Base) ( in one of the last surviving DC3's in the US Airforce. What a trip! There were no seats, just benches along the sides. The door consisted of a canvas screen you could pull back and watch the Baltic slide by from about 5000 feet. When we hit the ground at Rhine-Main one of the engine cowlings fell off. It was a gas. We played some basketball games and did some extreme partying. At the end of the ten day vacation we were scheduled to fly back to Fornebu. Unfortunately, replacing the missing engine cowling was more than problematical – it meant making a new one! So, when we got back to Rhein-Main we found a “backup” of personnel waiting for transport back to Norway. Someone had to stay behind and wait for the next flight – which was a week away. We drew straws. I lost.

I had no money left so they took up a collection and gave me about $25 for the week. I was ok for barracks and food ( AF canteen was very good ); but I had nothing to do and didn't know anyone. I did get the bus into Weisbaden once for a look-around. Exciting?

The highlight came one morning as I was standing in the mess hall waiting for breakfast. As I got closer to the front of the line, I noticed that the lady who was serving was an enormous, horse-faced German hausfrau. I glanced at her name tag. It read Kauffman. I quickly took mine off and stuffed it in my pocket. What a lucky guy I am.

Eventually, I got back to Oslo and the warm bosom of AFNORTH.

In my absence my (eventual) wife had arrived. She was a Wren (Women's Royal Naval Service). Essentially she was a secretary. There were two Wrens on the base. They lived in a hotel in Oslo. Not a bad life.

Winter in Norway is cold, very cold. It is also dark, very dark. Some respite came when the NATO fleet sailed into Oslo harbour and hundreds of matelots arrive at the JRC for one almighty booze-up. I distinctly remember the carpet being under about two inches of beer.

The long Norwegian winter moved into spring and the vacation continued. In the autumn of 1970 I drove from Oslo to Kristiansand and took a ferry to Harwich to meet my prospective in-laws. My first view of England was from the deck of a North Sea ferry. It looked grey, dark and dreary. I was not far from being wrong.

I got leave to go to England for the wedding in December 1970. Unfortunately before I left, I had my first run-in with the US Army since I had got to Norway. I applied for leave, which was granted, but I foolishly went to collect my mail at a particularly inopportune time. The First Sergeant saw me and shouted at me to get in the office.

I should explain. Owing the the complete lack of military supervision, we had gotten used to leaving our hair quite long, which was the fashion in 1970. My buddy BJ actually looked like he would not have been out of place at Haight and Ashbury. Mine was equally long. The First Sergeant was not amused, so he put me in a chair and gave me a haircut. It was a particularly inexpert job. She who must be obeyed was not amused.

Winter turned into spring 1971 as my service lurched towards its conclusion. I was offered an E5 (Sergeant) post if I would sign on again and stay in Norway. I declined, not entirely respectfully. We packed up, having first sold most of my duty free allowances (which I had been hoarding since my new responsible as husband and provider had ensued), and headed for Fornebu for the flight to New York.

Pan Am had the craziest pilots I've ever seen. (Perhaps, that's why they went bust?) I'm not the greatest of flyers at the best of times, but these guys were something else. Cruising along in the stratosphere over Greenland, the Captain spied a small Inuit village. Whilst carrying on an interesting commentary on the PA, he stood the 707 on its wing tip and announced that we were going to drop down and say hello. I swear I could count he hairs on the eskimo's luxurious fur coat as we passed by. Lovely.

We landed at JFK and a typically surly and unhelpful New York taxi driver took us to the hotel in a typically circuitous and roundabout way to jack up the fare. (I've never liked New York and never will) I reported to Ft Hamilton for processing. I received my Good Conduct Medal and my Honourable Discharge from the US Army. My illustrious military career was over. We hopped a plane to KC to be met by my Dad, my sister Lynne and my brother Jim.

Chiefs Inept?

Chiefs Woes Continue

I've been lucky. The scheduling has meant that the Chiefs have been live on TV for two of the three games so far this season.

(I can hear someone out there screaming that I've been very unlucky the way they are playing!)

Fans could just about take the lacklustre performance against the Texans – at least we won the game. You could make some kind of a case for the effort against the Broncos. Given just a little bit of co-operation from the football gods, we could have won.

But, the Packers? The Packers? Crisis time is looming large.

Now don't get me wrong, the Packers are a good football team. But, disappointingly, and I mean ugly disappointingly, the Chiefs made them look like a great football team. One of my enduring images of the game was Aaron Rogers sitting on the sidelines (having constructed a big lead) looking over the results of his efforts and smiling condescendingly.

Forget the score. The Chiefs were never in this game.

Why? Where to start?

On offence the Chiefs could not move the ball. The tone was set right at the beginning. The pre-game hype had it that the boys in red could run the ball and Jamaal Charles would have a big day. He got 49 yards on 11 carries. The three TD's are irrelevant. The running game was more or less non existent the whole game. Meanwhile the Packers could keep the Chiefs defense honest by rushing for 130 yards.

So, we had to rely on Alex Smith to win the game with his arm. Not pretty sight. Again the stats are misleading. The Great Hope that was Jeremy Macklin had no catches in the first half. He finished with what looks like a respectable afternoon – 8 catches for 141 and a touchdown. Take away the one big catch and he averages about 10 yards a catch. For this we paid big money? (Watching him miss simple downfield blocking assignments was too painful to comment on.)

On defence, the tribe looked like rabbits in the headlights. Tamba Hali had a sack. The containment of a mobile QB like Rogers was on a high school level. The tacking dummy would have been of more use than the real players. It was embarrassing to watch. The Packers had seven sacks and god knows how many hurries.

So, is this just a bad day at the office? Was this just a game the Chiefs were destined to lose anyway? Can they put this performance behind them and move on?

The signs are not good.

Andy Reid's post-game press conference was interesting. He could barely contain his exasperation at the lack of skill, preparation or professionalism in the team. It is his job to prepare the players, and I'm now wondering if he is up to it.

Yes, it's only game three. There is another game away next week (mercifully not on TV, I hope) against the 3-0 Bungles who were narrow winners over the Ravens.

Another poor performance by Reid, Smith and the other starters could start the boo-boys, start the calls for Chase Daniels at QB, start the call for Reid to go and start the beginning, if not the end, of a reality check. A one and three start is staring the Chiefs in the face and the omens are not good.

US Army - Part Two

Wherein I sojourn in Texas (the only place in the world where you can stand up to your bum in mud and have the sand hit you in the face), do my RVN training, am posted to the Big Red One and end up in Norway

It is generally true that we humans have a very over-inflated opinion of our ability to affect events. We like to think we are in control. We like to believe, “I am the master of my fate, I am the captain of my soul”.

This is, in my experience, seldom true. You could just as easily argue that life is a series of unanticipated and unrelated accidents. My experiences in 69 - 70 - 71 prove this point rather nicely.

I had leave over Christmas 1969 and spent it in Independence. No-one else was about. Everyone was off was assisting Uncle Sam. I saw the family and a few friends. I booked my ticket to Texas on Trans-Texas Airways. I think I flew to College Station, Texas. I remember I had a lot of trouble getting a ticket. I soon found out why.

Fort Hood, Texas is near Waco. Near, in this context means Texas near, which is about about mid-distant between Waco and Austin. The adjacent town is called Killeen. It has little to offer the serving soldier, as Bell County was one of the dry counties in Texas. Even today just 11 the 254 counties in Texas are officially “wet”. It's a funny old place. You'd think with the sand hitting you in the face you could at least get a beer!

When I arrived in January 1969, there was a mass influx of personnel to Ft Hood. Why? Who knows? You may remember I got the word at Ft Bragg, “Who wants to go to Ft Hood?” and I said “Me!”.

There were so many troops arriving at the same time that our bags were left at the airport to be collected and delivered to the base over the next week or so.

I got lucky. I was assigned to Company C, 141^st Armoured Signal Battalion. I was shown to the barracks. I met some guys. I easily made some friends. The lucky boys in my barracks had managed to wrangle their way into a real cushy job. I was soon included.

Most of these lads were ex-crew chiefs on UH1 helicopters. Returning from Viet Nam, they had time to do and somehow ended up at Ft Hood. (If the Army had any sense they would have just discharged them and saved the money they were paying them!) Anyway, these troops had somehow become the specialists in Public Address systems.

Our job was simple. Every time the Commanding General (or some other high-ranking officer) wanted to make a speech, we set up the PA system. There was, in true Army fashion, an officer in charge but, none of them who were ever assigned to us had any idea what we did, how we did it, where we did it or when we did it. Magic! (Actually, the poor officers were at the mercy of the PA troops. If one decided to become too ARMY for us, the next time the CG grabbed the mike he was likely to get an electrical shock – officers of that type didn't last long!)

The best part was we did no duties. No KP. No guard duty. No duties other than take care of the PA system. We had two trucks and a jeep – none of which were subject to the ordinary Motor Pool regulations. We alone could sign them out. We went where we wanted, when we wanted and with whom we wanted. I never did completely understand how we did it – but it worked. The ranking NCO was only a SP/5, but he ran the whole show and also rings around anyone who started poking their noses into our business.

Sound too good to be true! Well, it was not always plain sailing. For example the General might make a welcoming speech in the theatre. Excellent. Set up the mikes and amps, plug them in and then go backstage and have a nap! Simple!

At other times, he might want to address the troops on a rifle range or a tank firing range. Not so simple. First of all you needed power. That meant a gas-powered generator and a lot of power cable. Not too much of a problem for our trucks were a veritable Aladdin’s Cave of stuff we had “borrowed” from other units. So, we had the equipment. But, to use it outdoors we needed sandbags – lots of lovely sandbags. The Commanding General did not want to hear the noise of a generator. We would have to build a double or triple sandbag enclosure around the generator - !2 feet high and five or six layers thick. We put the generator inside. Standing outside you couldn't hear it from 10 feet away. Then all you have to do is run the microphone cable and you were in business.

In the course of all these endeavours, I got to see some amazing, not always pleasant, sights. There was the time some tank driver – who wasn't looking where he was going – managed to hang a track over the side of a concrete bridge over a stream. He flipped the tank into the stream bed on it's turret. Unfortunately, this was one of the few times a Texas stream was filled with water. The whole crew was trapped inside and drowned. So, we set up the PA equipment and the Commanding General made a speech. No idea what he said for them boys in the tank were as dead as door-nails.

Another good one occurred when some bright spark was cleaning a 175mm self-propelled gun. Somehow he managed to hit the wrong switch and the gun began to elevate fully. Then the breech began to move smartly towards the bottom of the carriage. Bright Spark managed to get himself wedged into a very small space between the breech and the carriage.

In order to get him out, numerous ingenious solutions were suggested and some were even tried. The only thing that worked ruined the gun. Two large, metal D-rings were welded onto the barrel of the 175 and two tow trucks pulled and lifted at the same time. Bright Spark got out, but the gun was, not entirely unexpectedly, completely ruined! The CG had a lot to say about that one!

In between all these exciting events I coped with the Texas summer. We were lucky. We had air-conditioned barracks. Not everyone did. We were give salt tablets with every meal. I learned to chew tobacco. I watched the Moon landing in July of 69. I was effectively killing time. I bought a small motorcycle – a 150 cc Honda – on the back of which one of my mates, Quigley, used to ride with an M14 (remember the endless supply of contraband?) complete with ammo he had stolen from the rifle ranges and take pot shots at cows. Ft Hood was “open range”.

Then, the time was up.

I got orders for Viet Nam in late August. I was posted to the 1^st Infantry Division. I had injections for every disease known to man (and a few others). I did my RVN training – chiefly consisting of qualifying as Expert with the M16 and being eaten alive by Texas chiggers and I was all ready to go.

Then, I got a message to report to Company HQ.

The First Sergeant said that I was not going to Viet Nam. I asked him where I was going. He said he didn't know, but I was going somewhere. In short time, a big bunch shipped out for SE Asia. I hung around for about a week. Eventually the First Sergeant told me I was going to Norway instead. I said something like, “You've got to be shitting me – nobody goes to Norway!” He agreed but told me, nevertheless, I was going to Norway. I was joined in this effrontery to common sense by none other than SP/4 BJ Sievers, who I had not previously met, though we were in the same battalion. More will be heard of BJ anon.

(Having puzzled about this amazing event for years, I finally decided that it was all to do with the battery of tests you do when you are in Basic Training. Now, I was always good at tests so I scored highly. So did BJ. Therefore, when two guys who were in Norway left someone somewhere ran the replacement through the system our names came out.)

BJ and I suffered the ignominy of having to clear post – a ritual which involves taking a copy of your orders all over the place, giving a copy to the relevant authority (say the medical orderlies), and getting lots of stamps on the papers whilst all the while having to put up with, “So you guys off to the Nam, yeah?” “No, actually we're going to Norway.” “You gotta be shitting me! Hey sarge you gotta see this – these guys are going to Norway!”

We had become instant, small-time celebrities.

Within a few days, we had loaded my Honda in the trunk of BJ car – a Chevy four door as I remember and set off for KC. We had a week's leave. As BJ was from Iowa he said he would drop me off in Independence cause it was on the way. We cruised past Dallas and on to KC. He dropped me off and said we would meet up at JFK on September 6^th or 7^th or?

At the appointed date I flew to Kennedy, met up with BJ and flew to Norway via Iceland. In those days the old 707 couldn't do the whole trip without refuelling. I remember coming into Fornebu Airport in Oslo and the Captain saying it was 7 degrees! Fortunately, he was speaking Celsius.

Chiefs Super Bowl Bound?

Chiefs Prospects 2015

I have left my analysis of the Chiefs chances until late this year. We have only got down to the 53 man roster. Only now are the pundits beginning to make realistic appraisals of the chances of the various teams.

Interestingly, opinions are divided. Almost everyone, including the neutrals, think the Chiefs will be better this season. The question is – better than what?

It is difficult to see how they could be any worse. Just remember, they lost two very good players to injury almost before the season started. Then they managed to play 16 games and not throw a touchdown to a wide-receiver. Measuring getting better by those standards should result in some kind of improvement – it would be some accomplishment if they actually got worse! Certainly the pundits think so – well quite a few of them do.

I'm sure I said last year that as Alex Smith goes so goes the Chief's season. I was right. Smith was Ok and so was the season, just missing the play-offs. This season the ante is truly upped. The tribe have provided him with some weapons down-field. Jeremy Maclin is a big free-agent signing and is a proven NFL receiver. Travis Kelce is fit and could be the new Tony Gonzales. Rookie Chris Conley looks a good prospect for stretching the field. It's now up to Smith to find them downfield and complete some passes. Couple a real passing threat with Mr Reliable and Mr Do-It-All Jamaal Charles and some points are on the horizon. The play of back-up QB, Chase Daniel, also had the fans taking notice. An excellent pre-season – which saw the Chiefs undefeated – has shown Daniel to be a more than capable replacement. The O-line has been revamped and upgraded. Thin on the ground is true but still upgraded. The defense looks strong with Derek Johnson returning at inside LB and Justin Houston having signed a big contract. Eric Berry returns, but it remains to be seen how well he has recovered from cancer. Disregarding Sean Smith's suspension, the secondary looks strong. The Chiefs have some weapons and what could be an outstanding defense. They just finished 4-0 in the pre-season. The experts have them winning anything from 8 to 12 games.

My prediction: Chiefs to make the play-offs and be one and done.

If so, where are the problems? First, as said, Alex Smith. Then the O-line (unproven, untested and no real back-ups. The coaching is just average in my opinion. Andy Reid is a proven winner, but can he get the best out of the group on hand? Only time will tell. Finally, too many players are coming back from injury. Will they hold up for the season?

My biggest fear? The Chiefs may be at the back end of the cycle and have not got all the personnel in place for a run at the Super Bowl.

Time will tell.