QUESTIONS THAT HAUNT ME!
How important does a person have to be
before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck
wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?
Why does a round pizza come in a square
box?
What disease did cured ham actually
have?
How is it that we put man on the moon
before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on
luggage?
Why is it that people say they 'slept
like a baby' when babies wake up like every two hours?
Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON
TV?
Why do people pay to go up tall
buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the
ground?
Why do doctors leave the room while you
change?
They're going to see you naked
anyway...
Why is 'bra' singular and 'panties'
plural?
Why do toasters always have a setting
that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being
would eat?
Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto
remains on all fours? They're both dogs!
If corn oil is made from corn, and
vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle,
Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
Why did you just try singing the two
songs above?
Did you ever notice that when you blow
in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car
ride, he sticks his head out the window?
Why, Why, Why do we press harder on a
remote control when we know the batteries are getting dead?
Why do banks charge a fee on
'insufficient funds' when they know there is not enough money?
Why does someone believe you when you
say there are four
billion stars, but check when you say
the paint is wet?
Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?
Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
Why does Superman stop bullets with his
chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?
Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
If people evolved from apes, why are
there still apes?
Why is it that no matter what color
bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?
Is there ever a day that mattresses are
not on sale?
Why do people constantly return to the
refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have
materialized?
Why do people keep running over a
thread a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick
it up , examine it, then put it down to give the
vacuum one more chance?
Why is it that no plastic bag will open
from the end on your first try?
How do those dead bugs get into those
enclosed light
fixtures?
Why is it that whenever you attempt to
catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to
knock something else over?
In winter why do we try to keep the
house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?
How come you never hear father-in-law
jokes?
Why is there only one Monopolies
Commission?
MY FAVORITE.........
The statistics on sanity is that one
out of every four persons is suffering from some sort of mental
illness. Think of your three best friends -- if they're okay, then
it's you.
